Archive for September, 2012

Kansas is going Full Birther: State Board Considers Removing Obama From Ballot

Kansas Secretary of State Kris Kobach, an informal advisor to Republican presidential candidate Mitt Romney, said on Thursday he and his fellow members of a state board were considering removing President Barack Obama from the Kansas ballot this November.

The board is looking at a complaint filed by Joe Montgomery, of Manhattan, Kan., who claimed the Obama is not a natural born U.S. citizen and so is ineligible to be president. The man appears to be part of a group of conspiracy theorists known as “birthers,” who deny Obama’s birth certificate is real.

Doug: Oh, FFS. What do you wanna’ bet these people all support tort reform to end frivolous lawsuits? I’m sorry, but if after four years you are still hung up on Obama’s citizenship, you shouldn’t be allowed to vote.

But personally? I hope Kansas does it. I really do. I’m pretty sure what they’re suggesting is against the law, unconstitutional… and I think they’d find themselves in some trouble.

But go ahead. Do it. But here’s the deal. When someone throws the challenge flag and you’re overruled? You lose your senate and house seats for a decade; no more federal funding for your state; and if you miss a tax payment – we start bombing.

N. Dakota candidate for Senate, Rick Berg supports life sentences for rapists when the victim becomes pregnant and has an abortion. I’m sorry, did I say rapists? I meant victims

Rep. Rick Berg (R-ND), the candidate for Senate, voted for a bill that would have made any woman who obtained an abortion guilty of a homicide crime — even if it were in the case of rape or incest. Indeed, the bill Berg supported does not even contain an explicit exception if an abortion is necessary to save the woman’s life.

In 2007, Berg was among the small number of state representatives in the North Dakota House who supported the measure. It also would have imposed penalties on doctors and anyone else who “aids, abets, facilitates, solicits, or incites” a person into an abortion.

And here’s what the law said… “A person is guilty of a class AA felony if the person intentionally destroys or terminates the life of a preborn child.” A class AA felony carries a maximum sentence of life without the possibility of parole in North Dakota.

Doug: Well. Isn’t he just a breath of fresh air? And to think… at one point, the GOP actually stood a fair chance of flipping the senate. But now? I honestly think that more than 75% of the funds raised by the Republican Senate Campaign Committee is now going to antacids and whiskey for the senior staff to deal with profound stupidity like this.

Most Genuine V.P. Ever…

From this photo, it’s clear Biden never misses a chance… (* puts sunglasses on *)… to poll the electorate. YAAAHHHH!!!

But seriously… have you seen his wife, Jill? The old dude’s got game. Joe Biden and Jon Bon Jovi? Same dude.

The best thing about Joe? He is blessed with a congenital IN-ability to give even a single damn.

I swear… if Joe Biden came out with his own ice cream brand, I think he could surpass Romney in personal wealth within 2 years.

And you wonder why I’m against the death penalty? Read on…

Drew Peterson guilty of murder in ex-wife’s death

Former Illinois cop Drew Peterson was found guilty today of killing his wife, Kathleen Savio, and making it look like an accident in 2004.

The jury returned a verdict after two days of deliberations, just an hour after stopping discussions to ask the judge the meaning of the word “unanimous.”

Doug: At least we know he was tried by a jury of his peers.

They were probably afraid of possible personal ramifications from their verdict, and were inquiring if they could remain “unanimous” once their decision was announced.

But do you see my point? Do you really want to give people like this the task of sentencing a man to death? If they don’t know what unanimous means, what are the odds they know what “beyond a reasonable doubt” means? It is frightening that people’s lives are in the hands of people barely smart enough to find the courtroom.

Today in “Legitimate Rape” 4: s who assaulted 16-year-old thought it would be ‘funny’

Two Catholic school athletes who pleaded guilty to sexually assaulting a 16-year-old told police they did it because they thought it would be “funny,” according to court records released under a Jefferson County judge’s order.

After Dietrich initially complained about the plea deal the two teens received, Paul Richwalsky, chief prosecutor in the juvenile court division of the county attorney’s office, told her “Get over it and see a therapist. … The jail was for ‘real’ rapists, murderers and robbers,” according to an affidavit released Thursday.

The teen boys pleaded guilty to charges of first-degree sexual abuse, a felony, and misdemeanor voyeurism as part of the plea agreement. They are required to do 50 hours of volunteer work.

They said they lifted her shirt, pulled down her pants and penetrated her vagina with their fingers because, according to one of the teens, “we thought it would be funny, but it wasn’t.”

They said they took two or three pictures each, put Dietrich’s clothes back on and carried her upstairs to her room. Numerous other teenagers told police that the teens showed them the pictures, according to police reports.

Today in “Legitimate Rape” 3: Woman shoots and DECAPITATES rapist who made her pregnant before dumping his severed head in village square

A pregnant rape victim in Turkey shot and decapitated her attacker then left his severed head in the square of her local village.

The woman, five months pregnant, is demanding authorities let her have an abortion. The rapist had taken nude photos of her and threatened to send them to her parents unless she continued sleeping with him.

She took a gun and shot him ten times, several times in his private parts, before cutting off his head and hurling it into the village square at Yalvac. When police arrested her near to the severed head she said; ‘That is the head of one who toyed with my honor.’

Today in “Legitimate Rape” 2: Texas town says girl, 11, who was ‘gang raped was responsible because she was wearing makeup and looked older than her age’

Though a jury found Eric McGowen guilty of horrifically gang-raping an 11-year-old girl, the small Texas community of Cleveland remains divided on the rape – some residents have suggested the girl was partly responsible because of her appearance, sparking widespread condemnation.

Caroline King, who lives down the street, insisted Friday that people still ‘don’t know the facts of the case’ and said authorities were just ‘harassing people’ by knocking on doors in the town of about 7,700 people as they searched for McGowen.
It’s not as bad as what they are saying. Nobody tied (the girl) up,” said King, 59.

Today in “Legitimate” Rape 1: Judge to Woman Sexually Assaulted by Cop: “If you wouldn’t have been there that night, none of this would have happened to you.”

Last summer, a drunk Arizona police officer named Robb Gary Evans drove himself to a bar, flashed his badge to avoid paying cover at the door, and then walked up behind a woman, put his hand up her skirt, and ran his fingers over her genitals. A jury convicted him of sexual abuse, a felony with a maximum sentence of 2 and a half years in prison, and Evans was fired from the police force after an internal investigation.

Nevertheless, Arizona trial Judge Jacqueline Hatch, who was appointed to the bench by Gov. Jan Brewer (R-AZ), decided that Evans’ actions did not warrant jail time — sentencing him probation and 100 hours of community service. Evans also will not have to register as a sex offender. Yet, while Judge Hatch apparently did not view the disgraced former cop’s actions as particularly serious, she had some very harsh words for the woman he assaulted:

Bad things can happen in bars, Hatch told the victim, adding that other people might be more intoxicated than she was.

If you wouldn’t have been there that night, none of this would have happened to you,” Hatch said.

Unprecedented civil union unites Brazilian trio

Brazilian public notary Claudia do Nascimento Domingues set off a firestorm by granting Brazil’s first civil union to a trio, an act so unprecedented that there isn’t a word for it in Portuguese.

Brazilian public notary Claudia do Nascimento Domingues set off a firestorm by granting Brazil’s first civil union to a trio, an act so unprecedented that there isn’t a word for it in Portuguese.

Doug: Why ruin the ultimate male fantasy with matrimony? I mean… Polygamy is one wife too many, well… just like monogamy. And yes, ladies… I’m still single!

Dumbest Quote of the Week: Pastor says prayer team sent Isaac away from RNC

 A Tampa Bay pastor told the Christian Broadcasting Network her team prayed Tropical Storm Isaac away from the Republican National Convention.

The Rev. Jesten Peters of Keys of Authority Ministries told the Christian Broadcasting Network, “We have had lots and lots of people praying around the clock that it would move, and after you watch from the very beginning where they were saying it was coming and now where they say it is going, then it has really moved out of the way for us and we appreciate God doing that and moving it for us.”

Doug: If their prayers work THIS well… why wouldn’t they put this kind of effort into world peace or curing cancer or ending hunger and poverty?

 And let me see if I have this straight… God can steer a hurricane away from a political convention – but instead of just making it just die out or sending it out to sea and not hurting anybody – he sends it further down the coast and wreaks havoc on the same area and people he did 7 years ago. God seems to be ignoring that whole “love your neighbor as yourself” thing his son went on about. In short… God doesn’t sound like a very good Christian.